Tag: christianity

Don’t Just Take His Word For It

Do you know what your preacher says is true? How? What if he just made it up? Maybe your preacher just wants to bend or pervert scripture to make you feel all warm and fuzzy. You go every Sunday to punch your ticket because that’s what you’ve always done. You go every Sunday because you are supposed to. Well, of course you go because if you don’t you’re a bad person and God will be mad. You go because you need to make that appearance or the people in your community will start talking. Wrong wrong, wrong wrong wrong. God doesn’t care if you go to church. He would like you to. To be able to commune with other believers and worship with other believers and to use your spiritual gifts to serve one another. But how do you know if what you are being fed is the Word of God?

You are responsible for knowing your Bible. God is not a one hour a week acquaintance. I mean he used to be for me. Sometimes less than that. I’m not here to trash preachers but if you are going to sit under one you should know that he is teaching you directly from the Bible and not from a twisted version or interpretation of scripture. It says it directly in the Bible. “Beware of false prophets who come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravenous wolves.” Matthew 7:15. You are only getting a snippet of the Bible every Sunday. You can’t just memorize scripture and be able to reel off a few verses when the circumstances call for it. Anyone can memorize scripture. Your Pastor can memorize scripture but does he know what it’s saying? Is he explaining it correctly? How would you know? Because scripture speaks for itself. Scripture explains itself. It’s not man’s interpretation or how we feel it best suits our lives or the culture that happens to be most popular at the time. How can we be so sure? There are several sure fire ways.

The Bible never contradicts itself. Any true interpretation or prophecy must align with the overall message of the entire text. Any confusing text or difficult text will always be explained by clearer texts elsewhere in the Bible. You must always read a verse in its entirety. You must read with all the surrounding verses and chapters to gain context. You also must know the culture and historical setting of the time. It makes a difference. For example in Leviticus where it says “You shall not make any cuts on your body for the dead or tattoo yourselves: I am the Lord.” Leviticus 19:28 People are quick to throw that up when they see a Christian has a tattoo. Do you know why God said that at the time and why it is not relevant now? He commanded the Israelites not to tattoo their body because the Pagans did it as part of a mourning ritual and idol worship to their false Gods. It was to separate themselves from the Pagans and not get caught up in idolatry. So unless you are tattooing yourself to worship idols today I think you’re in the clear. That’s why it’s important to know the historical and cultural setting. That’s why it’s important to sit under someone who is schooled. Someone who knows the Word and has studied it. But why must you know it? Several reasons.

How will you know God if you don’t? You can’t get to know God and have a relationship with him by doing a quick check in once a week. That’s not how you get to know someone. Especially someone that has done so much for you. My word he knew you before you were born and loved you so much that he hung himself on a cross and said, I will die for you. I will take all your sins, everything you are going to do, no matter how evil. Put those on me. We need to get to know a God like that. The only way to get to know him is to spend time with him. Meeting with him on a daily basis. Reading your Bible and studying scripture. If you don’t you won’t have any idea if what’s coming from the pulpit is the word or a wolf to drag you straight to hell. You need to know when you hear something that doesn’t line up with scripture to remove yourself. You need to see an elder or go through whatever channels your church has set in place to question these things. You need to find out what’s going on. Did you misunderstand? Did the Pastor really say what he said and are the elders in complete agreement? Jesus warned his disciples. “Behold I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents and harmless as doves.” Matthew 10:16. Basically, don’t be dumb. Be smart. Be intelligent. Be alert. Don’t be naive or deceived and don’t use these things in dealing with people.

I’m going to wrap this up and I have kind of run on but this has been an intense topic for me. Christians aren’t serious enough about getting into the word and we just expect someone else to do all the work. Feed me my dose of Jesus on Sunday and I’m all good. Well, it takes more than that. I think I’m so riled up after watching the Death of a Pastors Wife documentary on Netflix as many of you are. I don’t want to get into breaking that down and the details. But there was one thing that hit me about the whole documentary. Does nobody in that church know scripture? No one is holding him accountable to what he is preaching. Let’s just put aside all his other moral failures. Where are the elders? Maybe if anyone in the church had studied scripture or been the least bit strong in their faith Mica Miller might be alive. There are more people to be held accountable for her death than John Paul Miller. A whole church of blind, scripturally ignorant people.

Seek First

When did you start living your life? Have you always or have you felt like you had to hide who you were to some extent? Did you feel like you started living your life when you went to college and had your freedom. Maybe it was just that first moment you were able to get out from underneath your parents and find a roommate or get your own place. Maybe it was when you got married. Maybe it was after all that and the kids and you became an empty nester. We all have different experiences and different ideas of what it means to actually start living your life. To be who you want to be. To feel good about who you are and where you are at.

I was flipping through the channels the other day, because let’s face it, there is never anything on. No matter how many channels, streaming services or platforms you have. I did end up stopping on one reality show for a few minutes because it was one I had not seen before. I must admit I am a reality show junkie. The conversation being between two women about being your authentic self. They had both grown up in what they considered a very “religious household” and were not able to start living their lives until they “broke free”from that. They did not go into any detail on what that meant. There can be the wrong type of “religious” to impose on a household. That got me thinking about myself.

I grew up in a religious household, where my parents taught me about God and Jesus. Ultimately, it was my choice to believe in Him or walk away. I chose to believe but kept my distance, as being too close felt stifling. Once I gained independence, I sought experiences that defined living for me—free from anyone telling me what to do or how to do it. However, this led to long periods of depression and anxiety. I attempted various ways to fill the emptiness loneliness and unsatisfactoriness (that may not be a word) but that’s how I felt. Chaotic. That’s how everything felt. I was living a chaotic life. I wasn’t truly living my life; instead, I was bouncing from one thing to another, searching for peace.

Along the way I rekindled my relationship with God here and there but it never really stuck. I believed in all he had done for me but I wasn’t ready to surrender and say “OK God, your will be done not mine.” I had to be ready to give over the drinking, the drugs, the lying, the cheating, the stealing all the things in my life that kept me apart from God. All the things in my life that made it impossible for me to sit down and get close to God every day. All of those things I thought were so much fun were really giving me anxiety and depression hurting my marriage and my relationship with my son and my family. We try so hard to hold on to our sins because life would be such a drag without them. Oh, if you only knew how peaceful and joyful it was with them gone. Don’t get me wrong. It didn’t happen overnight. It was a process. I still fall and stumble and I always will. That song Cuss a little by Kylie Morgan, I’m trying not to make that about me, I am human. I am a sinner and I’m ok with that. That’s the best thing about this process, I know God loves me just the way I am and I have stopped flogging myself for being a bad christian. His grace covers me. I still have depression now and again and anxiety but nothing like it used to be.

So when one of these ladies said that it’s exhausting not really living as your authentic self and you are just simply existing I can imagine that it is. I can also tell you that trying to find yourself is not the answer. You will search until the end of your days to fill that hole in your life with worldly comforts but you will only find your peaceful living when you find the authentic Jesus and let him show you who he is. Let him fill you up and seek him above all things.

Seek first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33

Pruning for Growth

What an amazing weekend! I had the privilege of attending the Women’s Bloom Conference at Mechanicsville Christian Center and hearing Kelly Minter speak. It was as if the conference was made just for me. God knows what you need and when you need it. There were around 500 women at the conference. I’m sure if you had half an ear open, you couldn’t help but hear God speak through her message.

Kelly spoke confirmation to the journey I’m on and staying on that journey. The big question, What does it mean to bear fruit in our lives? How do we bear that fruit? That’s me, I’m a tree that has been unattended and overgrown for so long. I have needed pruning. I have had an apple here or there and I have remained a tree. I know the master gardener loves me. Still, I’m afraid that if I let him prune me, it will hurt. I also worry that I won’t like the finished product. The other trees around me like me just fine. What if they don’t want to be around me after he’s pruned me? He might cut away the things that I think make me who I am.

When my Dad died something in my life changed. I needed Jesus. I finally had to face the truth. My way doesn’t work. Happiness is fleeting, joy is something totally different and it comes from the inside and can only come from Jesus. When I let Jesus have all the parts of me I was holding on to he began to prune. Yes, it was painful and uncomfortable. Those things happen when you let your old self die and begin to live and really follow Jesus. Some of the other trees don’t really like this pruned and shaped up tree. I’m OK with that. 50 years. It’s taken 50 years to feel this kind of joy. This is the best I have ever felt in my whole 50 years.

Don’t get me wrong. I still have my migraines, depression can creep in some days. Life isn’t perfect. I’m sure God will keep pruning me until he’s ready for me to come home. Who knows what hardships I will face before then. Ultimately God has got me. I am not in control. Of anything. He’s got this. I have to put my trust in that fact. God’s got this.

A couple VERSE’S from this weekend. – You did not choose me, but I chose you. I appointed you to go and produce fruit and that your fruit should remain, so that whatever you ask the father in my name, he will give you. – John 15:16 – He chose us. He appointed us. He wants us to produce fruit, and he wants our fruit to be long lasting. The father wants to answer our prayers. – I am the vine, you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit. Apart from me he can do nothing. John 15:5 – To bear bountiful fruit we must remain connected to the vine. We must remain connected to life. That vine, that life is Jesus.

I am just excited for life. I am excited for things to come. I am excited that drinking and drug use is not clouding my mind. I am alive and energized and can’t wait to see what he puts in front of me. You too can have that excitement and energy. Jesus loves you no matter where you’ve been or the choices you’ve made in the past. If you would like to know more about Jesus, send me a message. If you are curious about my testimony, feel free to ask. I’ll be happy to share. Till next time, watch a panda video, it will make you laugh!

Finding Peace in Pain

This past weekend came to a halt when I woke up with such severe nausea I could not move. I deal with chronic pain and look completely fine from the outside. It has been hard for me to express my pain to others. This includes both physical and mental pain. I wish it were visible to others, like a broken leg or black eye. It would certainly make it easier to explain and talk about.

For those that have never dealt with depression or chronic pain, it can be extremely hard to understand. It’s difficult to wrap your head around something you can’t see. Everyone has an opinion or advice on what you can do to get better. You’re depressed, you should get up and take a walk. You need a hobby or have you tried to talking to a therapist? You have, well maybe they aren’t the right therapist, you need to find a new one. Those migraines you have been having would go away if you change your diet. Essential oils have helped so many people, I bet they will help you as well. If you exercise more your migraines will decrease. Have you tried this medication or that medication? It’s not that the concern is not appreciated. However, it’s not quite as simple as popping a couple Advil or thinking good thoughts.

Do you want to know what has worked the best? Trusting in the Lord. It has taken me years to get to this point. It was so freeing once I finally did. I am still doing everything on my end with my Dr.’s to lessen the number of migraines I get and countless other issues I struggle with. But they are just temporary. I prayed throughout these last three days for healing. I have prayed for understanding. I have most of all prayed for God’s peace. The difference in trusting God with all that I am going through is that I have nothing to fear. God will bring me through to the other side. Whatever is on the other side is for the glory of God. It is also for the good of those who love him. It may not be what I have planned but who am I to know what’s good for me. Isn’t my Father in Heaven, the creator of all heaven and earth, isn’t he a better judge of what’s best for me? I’m sure of it. God showed me that even through sickness I can be content and peaceful. He gave me such peace that I have never felt before. “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:7

So I say to anyone suffering with chronic illnesses. If you’re dealing with mental health issues or any illness, please know that God sees you. It’s not easy dealing with these issues but you don’t have to struggle alone. I know that one day I will be healed and all pain will be gone from my body. You too can have that same guarantee if you believe in Jesus Christ as your Lord and savior. That he died on the cross for your sins and mine and rose again on the third day. Our time on earth is so short compared to eternity. My weekend was so much more bearable because I chose to have God by my side. You can do the same.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. Proverbs 3:5